Apr 7, 2011

Replici memorabile

O mini-colecţie de replici din filme pe gustul meu. Inteligente, semnificative, distractive, memorabile. Nu le caut pe cele neapărat celebre sau din topuri. Acestea se găsesc într-o listă specială. Mai degrabă cele pour les connaisseurs


Această postare va fi actulizată în zilele ce urmează. Îmi propun o normă: una pe film. Altfel, dintr-unele filme aş putea lua tot scenariul cu copy-paste. Orice propuneri prind bine!

Die Hard
Bruce Willis
(În plin război cu teroriştii, se strecoară prin instalaţia de aerisire, la lumina brichetei şi îşi aminteşte invitaţia soţiei
Come out to the coast, we'll get together, have a few laughs...

Jungle Book
J. Pat O'Malley, Verna Felton
-Espirit de Corps. That's the way I earned my commission in the Majarajah's Fifth Pachyderm Brigade. Back in '88 it was. Or... or was it?
-Here it comes. The Victoria Cross bit again.
-It was then I received the Victoria Cross for bravery above and beyond the call of duty. Ha ha! Those were the days. Discipline! Discipline was the thing! Builds character, and all that sort of thing, you know. 

The Pink Panther Strikes Again (1976)
Peter Sellers
Of course it won't be easy; nothing worthwhile ever is. That is why I have always failed where others have succeeded.

Secretul lui Bachus
Ştefan Mihăilescu Brăila, Emil Hossu
-Aş putea-ndrăzni să am curajul de-a cuteza...
-Dar vă rog!
-...să vă invit la un mic local... ceva modest, intim... mai vorbim, mai analizăm, chestii, socoteli.

You've Got Mail 
Tom Hanks
The Godfather is the I-ching. The Godfather is the sum of all wisdom. The Godfather is the answer to any question. What should I pack for my summer vacation? "Leave the gun, take the cannoli." What day of the week is it? "Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday".

Zorba grecul
Anthony Quinn
God has a very big heart but there is one sin he will not forgive: if a woman calls a man to her bed and he will not go. I know because a very wise old Turk told me.

Inglorious Basterds
Brad Pitt
Sgt. Hugo Stiglitz? Lt. Aldo Raine. These are the Basterds, ever heard of us? We just wanted to say we're a big fan of your work. When it comes to killing Nazis. I think you show great talent. And I pride myself on having an eye for that kind of talent. But your status as a Nazi killer is still amateur. We all come here to see if you wanna go pro.

Asfalt tango
Constantin Cotimanis
Alo, alo, alooo, ce faş m'? De câte ori să-ţi spun, bă, că asta e maşina mea proprietate personală, ă? Aici io sunt Ceauşescu! S-a-nţeles? Te-ai atins de maşinuţă, te-ating la muzicuţă, băi...!

The Pursuit of Happyness
Will Smith
This part of my life... this part right here... This part is called "being stupid".

Bruce Almighty (Dumnezeu pentru o zi)
Morgan Freeman, Jim Carrey
-Bruce... I'm God.
-Bingo! Yahtzee! Is that your final answer? Our survey says... God! Bing bing bing bing bing! Well, it was nice to meet you, God. Thank you for the Grand Canyon, and good luck with the Apocalypse. Oh, and by the way, you suck!

Buletin de Bucureşti
Catrinel Dumitrescu, Geo Saizescu, Mircea Diaconu
-Dar părăsirea de domiciliu?
-Perfect! Acesta-i un motiv serios! Îmi pot şi eu construi pledoaria: sărmana femeie..., cu ochii la uşă..., îşi aşteaptă soţul iubit..., iar el... bestia! Etcetera, etcetera! Adresa!
-Ştiţi, noi nu avem un domiciliu stabil.

Lista lui Schindler
Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes
-That's what the Emperor said. A man steals something, he's brought in before the Emperor, he throws himself down on the ground. He begs for his life, he knows he's going to die. And the Emperor... pardons him. This worthless man, he lets him go.
-I think you are drunk.
-That's power, Amon. That is power.

Nea Mărin miliardar
Jean Constantin, Petre Lupu
-Fac prinsoare c-a avut centură neagră!
-Da, chief, i-am recunoscut stilul: nicoroticava!
-Ni-co-ro-ti-ca-va!
-Lucrează fulgerător, chief!

Maradona by Kusturica
Diego Armando Maradona
Mira que Havelange estuve veinte años sin que Brasil sale campeon. E tu sabes porque? Porque El de arriba es justo. El Barba es justo!

Law Abiding Citizen
Gerard Butler
I'm gonna pull the whole thing down. I'm gonna bring the whole fuckin' diseased, corrupt temple down on your head. It's gonna be biblical!

Filantropica
Gheorghe Dinică
Vă e milă? V-am luat banii!

The Hours
Meryl Streep (Clarisa)
Ştii acel sentiment că totul e posibil? Şi mă gândesc: deci acesta este începutul fericirii. Acum începe. Şi negreşit va creşte cu timpul. Niciodată nu mi-am dat seama că nu a fost începutul: a fost fericirea. În acel moment. Chiar atunci! (traducerea mea, Mihai Cuza)

Operaţiunea Monstrul
Toma Caragiu, Octavian Cotescu
-Rotativa Mepps comet size!
-Nu, nu. Rotativă-n septembrie? În Deltă? Pe Corciovata? La ora 10? Noo, un Efzett 18!
-Forfacu de 22 centimetri, forfacu! Doctorul Barbillon, în vestita lui carte „Cum se poate prinde peştele mic cu unelte mari”, face următoarele precizări: „Efzett 18 în niciun caz!”.

Forrest Gump
Afemo Omilami, Tom Hanks
-Gump! What's your sole purpose in this army?
-To do whatever you tell me, drill sergeant!
-God damn it, Gump! You're a god damn genius! This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard. You must have a goddamn I.Q. of 160. You are goddamn gifted, Private Gump. Listen up, people...

Casablanca
Humphrey Bogart (Rick)
Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine!

Rocky Balboa
Sylvester Stallone
Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!

BD la munte şi la mare
George Mihăiţă
S-a urcat după o vrabie sus şi nu mai putea să se dea jos. Săraca! Permiteţi-mi să mă prezint: brigadier silvic Haralambie Harpalete! Zât!

Any Given Sunday
Al Pacino
You find out life's this game of inches, so is football. Because in either game - life or football - the margin for error is so small. I mean, one half a step too late or too early and you don't quite make it. One half second too slow, too fast and you don't quite catch it. The inches we need are everywhere around us. They're in every break of the game, every minute, every second. On this team we fight for that inch. On this team we tear ourselves and everyone else around us to pieces for that inch. We claw with our fingernails for that inch. Because we know when add up all those inches, that's gonna make the fucking difference between winning and losing!

Fight Club
Brad Pitt
Welcome to Fight Club!
The first rule of Fight Club is: you do not talk about Fight Club.
The second rule of Fight Club is: you DO NOT talk about Fight Club!
Third rule of Fight Club: if someone yells "stop!", goes limp, or taps out, the fight is over.
Fourth rule: only two guys to a fight.
Fifth rule: one fight at a time, fellas.
Sixth rule: the fights are bare knuckle. No shirt, no shoes, no weapons.
Seventh rule: fights will go on as long as they have to.
And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight.

The Negotiator
Samuel L. Jackson
A quick lesson in lying. See, this is what us real cops do: We study liars. Example: If I ask you a question about something visual, like your favorite color, your eyes go up and to the left. Neurophysiology tells us your eyes go in that direction, because you're accessing the visual cortex. So you're telling the truth. If your eyes go up and right, you're accessing the brain's creative centers and we know you're full of shit. 

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